Sunday 24 July 2016

FORGIVENESS: An uncommon virtue

STORYLINE: Forgiveness, an uncommon virtue.


 By Best odianosen.
A
 young man graduated from a second generation university in Nigeria and got a job to earn a living, even though it was not a dream job, but it was able to put food on his table with a very little margin for savings. The young man understanding his own worth decided to continue to work very hard considering that he will soon settle down and take responsibility of a husband. Shortly after about three (3) years on the self-same job, he got married not to the lady he actually wished to, but to another lady whom he barely knows for two (2) years as against the one he has known from his early teenage.
The young man is temperamentally phlegmatic, so was able to cope with all the attitudinal change that ensued as a result of change in wife personnel. The marriage became an epitome of God’s blessing in every respect of it, as you may want to desire in a marriage. It later extended to his hard work being rewarded with a new, bigger and better job with every benefit attached which are so difficult to turn down that required him being moved out of his current station to a faraway city.
The arrival of the job was celebrated by every member of the families, on hearing the news, though with some missed feelings, because of the associated location of the job, it was a difficult pie to swallow initially, however, were able to cope with the situation later. The first few years of the better job secured were enjoyable to the extent that both of them could call themselves several times in a day, the high call frequency later start to diminish especially from the side of the woman, the husband considering his phlegmatic temperament who is pre-disposed to cope with every situation did not have any problems with his wife’s character. The story continues;
The young man visited home on one occasion and discovered that his wife’s ways of dressing has changed for the better and not worse-off, but her warm attitude towards him has diminished, that is the usual fervor, that is characterized by long physical absence from one another was greatly reduced.
The young man was careful and considering his nature, he decided to thoughtfully ask his wife what the matter was with a low and gentle voice he asked D, I noticed that you have changed, he first of all praised her improved way of dressing, but later asked her for the reason why she had lost her most cherished fervor. The woman after enjoying the praises concerning her improved dress style, in order to respond to the question sequel to the lovely praise, immediately said the sudden loss of affinity was the result of his long absence which was no longer bearable. The young man paused awhile and said ‘strange’ a few days later his one week holidays expired and later returned to his official base.
Caught in the quagmire of wonder, the young man continued to wonder for the very first time, if what the wife told him was the truth, this continued uncontrollable every day since his arrival at his base, day in day out for the first few days of his resumption back in office. He just could not phantom any reason why he should believe his wife, he then began to think out a plan on what he would do to clear every iota of doubt, because at work, he uncontrollably finds it difficult to concentrate, based on the simple reason that he has come to love his wife so dearly, and he knew that something has gone wrong somewhere which cannot really figure out.
It is true that his wife was not his first love, just like people generally say or are meant’ to believe that ‘first love never dies’, but this young man has been able to develop his love for his wife, with the knowledge that he cannot have another wife, it is better and safer to develop the one you have already and cherish her, and his unwillingness to lose her.
W
hat happened was that after two (2) weeks, in the midweek of the third week, after returning to his official base, he decided to make another journey back home without any prior notice. Guess what he met and saw with his naked eyes, is an incredibly mind blowing on that faithful day. You know as the father and senior member of the house/family of course he has access to his own portion of the keys to the house, not suspecting anything to the contrary, he went in straight to his bedroom, he saw what he could explain to anybody, he met his adorable wife on his matrimonial bed with his very good friend in the family way, inexcusable.
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The young man immediately after seeing them both in a form that is not deniable, went out of the bedroom into the living room sat down and very calm. The culprit knowing the crime he had committed quickly ran out through the back door and escaped for his dear life.
The wife came out from the room shivering with fear, unsure of what might happen, broke down in tears, on her kneels pleading for mercy and forgiveness from her husband who loved her so much, she was at the same time asking for audience from him so as to give an explanation for her action. The man who had already been dazed with wonder and bewilderment, was speechless, self-controlled, he never yelled at her, neither did he raise a finger at her. This is the type that people will begin to say that he is a weak man, considering the way the young man reacted to the incident, is he really weak? Or there is something in him that is beyond the physical that the carnal mind cannot comprehend?
While the wife was still in her posture, different thoughts were running through his mind such as; is this why he could not concentrate in the office? Where has he missed it? What should he do in this situation? Who can he talk to now? Where will he begin from? Should he forgive her? Is this forgivable? But this is a legal ground for divorce, how can she do this to me? By the corner is his ‘ex’ who is still unmarried, probably may like this in order to grab this long awaited opportunity The man was actually in a dilemma. Please my beloved readers as you read and have fun, I like you to make useful comments and air you view freely.
The young man only utters a question, why did you do it? She answered and said it is the Devil, a second question was where is the devil? Readers please you can help the woman out with the answer here please.
A few days later, the young man returned to his station, with the matter still pending unresolved, he received a call from his ‘ex’ he thought it was a usual call, but it was not the case, she got to know about the incident, by what means at that point the man could not tell, he was so surprised wondering who must have told her, knowing fully well that he has not told anyone about it, while he was still thinking about who must have told her, the ‘ex’ decided to ‘break the camel’s back’ and inform him that it was his dear lovely wife who told her, including how he reacted to the issue. She decided to give him her own piece of mind, what she thinks as follows;
‘I know you must be hurt by what has happened and probably by what I am going to say now, am not here to speak to my favour, for the very reason that your wife could trust me to inform me of what has happened, despite not being close to your family but distant family friend for the very reason that you know even better, I am honoured, when your wife came calling with the news, I was surprised myself that I could not back but to ask her the reason for her choice’. She answered and said: because she knew that you and I were good friends and that we understood on another very well’ I asked a second question, that what made think I will give a good and objective advice? She said because is an open minded man, he does not hide anything from her and that his testimony about her coupled with what she knows about were enough for her to rely on. These were the responses of your wife.
M
y advice to you is that, you should find a place in your heart to forgive your wife. I know it is a difficult thing to do, but it is not impossible. As long as you were able to hold back and self-controlled at the scene of the incident, I think you can forgive her. The reason why you must forgive her is that;
Firstly, if she were in your place she would have forgiven you, and forgiveness is a command, Jesus Christ said in Matthew chapter 18 vs 21, 22. “Then Peter came to him, and said Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive? Till seven times? Jesus said unto him, I say not unto thee, until seven times: but, until seventy times seven”.
Secondly, your lovely wife still loves you, she is ready to remain with you for the rest of her life, she has realized her mistake and has repented from it, please forgive her, she said.
The young man became confused the more on hearing all these from someone who ordinarily would have been subtlety saying things to discredit the wife, in a way so as to fast-rack their separation instead she is doing the contrary, thereby becoming an uncommon friend in need. Is it possible to forgive in a situation such as this?  
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JESUS IS LORD, AND HE IS COMING BACK AGAIN.












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